fighting fate
June 24, 2002, 11:37 pm
i didnt realize how much i actually missed him until 2day. me and kristin r sittin in her living room watchin kate and leopold...which really isnt sad...and i just started 2 cry. and i cried 4 like the whole last hour of the movie. and then when kristin drove me home...i just started bawling. kerri got hers...y cant i have mine? am i that horrible of a person that fate...that God doesnt allow me 2 have the 1 person that makes me truly happy. and its not like ne1 around me wants me either...i mean i would luv a steady boyfriend here...some1 2 love and 2 have and 2 hang on 2. but i cant even have that. fate will fite me til my dieing day. i guess if u cant have the one u most deeply want...u dont get ne1 @ all. ugh. i mean there are guys here that i would b more than happy and willing 2 date and stay steady w/...but nun of em want me. @ least not 4 keeps newayz. im not that intruiging. im the one that every1 wants 4 1 nite...never 4 good. wuts so wrong w/ me? ppl say nuthing...but that cant b true...cuz that means that theres sumthin wrong w/ every1 else...which is a bit extreme. im 2 confusing...im 2 complex...im 2 bitchy...2 harsh...2 secretive yet @ the same time brutally honest...im deceiving...im everything nobody wants. but of course nobody wants 2 no who i truly am...only 1 person dus...but im 2 horrible 2 have him. o God 4 once give me a break...im so sorry.
i wonder wut it takes 2 get on fates good side...?
Lyrics from Savage Garden's Crash and Burn and are copyrighted to Savage Garden