indecisive
Monday, Dec. 29, 2003, 12:34 am
ive been browsing through random strangers' diaries
just avoiding my own i assume
some people out there are incredible interesting. i mean half the time i had no idea of what they were talking about...but yet i was still hooked anyways.
i wonder if my diary has that effect on anyone.
new years plans still havent been made. i really dunno what were all gonna do. hopefully something fun. it would suck if new years eve ended up being a total waste.
i keep gettin sick from eating. like...unbearably sick. and today i threw up my lunch. it was bad. i had taco bell...one taco and 2 bites of another...and about 4 of those lil cinnamon twists things. then i got home and threw it all up.
strange.
and then of course without any concern for my health my father cheerily called out "come out to the yard as soon as you can. ill be out there" while im still hugging the toilet.
it wasnt til after i helped rake and after i cleaned the house that he showed a slight interest in how i was feeling.
the man surely does have his priorities. but thats really nothing new.
i had dinner with jessica mason tonight. that was nice. man i miss that girl. i miss the fun that we all used to have togehter. i miss the night that she took me to randall's house just so i could get trashed cause things were so crappy. i miss that she let me be me.
im glad everythings going well for her.
i hope good times like the ones of last year are soon to come. that would make for an awesome junior and senior year.
afterward i just hung out at kristin landua's and watched gone in 60 seconds and then this old patrick swayze movie. lol it was fun. i felt sick most of the time...but it was still fun.
i still wish jeremy had called me though.
i am now an official member of the langham creek ymca. woo hoo! lol. theyve recently built a very nice facility a good 5 minutes from my house. easily accessible and cheap workouts. maybe i can finally lose weight.
that is...of course...if my thyroid will allow it. i really should go get that checked out.
im thinking of goin to get my legs waxed...just cause shaving is such a damn hassle. i think it would be an interesting experience. and i have a high tolerance for pain so i think i could handle it. yay for the brazilian wax. i am baffled...however...as to why is received the title "brazilian wax"...is that where the idea of gettin rid of all that nasty hair came from? i dunno. mayb its just something to call it.
maybe they drew the names of countries out of a hat.
christmas was really great. i didnt really get anything major...i did finally get a digital camera though and that rocks...but it was still a really awesome christmas.
im sad that its already gone.
ive been thinking alot lately about where i want to go for college.
i would really like to go out of state. the more and more i think about it...the more i want it. a major drawback is that i wont see my friends like id like to...but there are so many things offered out there that i couldnt deny myself that opportunity just for that security of people i know.
i would love to get in to UC Berkely for their business program. i think california would be an awesome place to attend college. just not near LA...that place is too crazy. i think it gives the entire state of cali a bad rap. anywho. id like that though. or duke. yes i know...other side of the continent...but its still an awesome school. and the climate of north carolina is close to the climate i hope to live in some day. summers that are hot enough for days at the beach and swimming pools and air conditioning...but still have winters with snow. plus its on the coast. i like the coast. just as long as its not too humid.
ok...so i honestly cant say that i have no idea where i want to go...but my ideas are very vague and very undefined. and if i do hafta stay in state for monetary reasons...i have no idea which school i would choose to attend. im an avid A&M fan no doubt...but UT has an excellent business program. but im not exactly sure if business is the way i want to go.
i guess im just gonna hafta do alot of research. i just hope that if i get the chance i can remain daring enough to venture to an out of state school.
im quite proud of myself. as i reflect on the past year...i realize that i havent let my own analysis and negative spin on things in my mind effect me as much. i think ive more so just accepted it...but i now know how to push it aside. im much happier this way. and i like that alot.
supposedly depression is tied to under-active thyroids like the ones in my family. add that to our already known disease and im screwed if i really am 'just like' my aunt susan like they say i am.
i really wish i had gotten to know her.
saturday was a really awesome day. well...minus my appointment at the eye doctor that morning. saturday afternoon jeremy and i ran errands...and it was really nice. and then he took me out to lunch @ tgi fridays and it was just...nice. something we havent done in a really long time. although i got sick once i got home. all our time spent together made it all worth it.
im so glad that despite everything going on right now...im still in a great mood. lol my entries may not depict such a joyful demeanor...but i really am happy. despite it all. and that is so fantastic.
ok well im off to do some college searching and such. enjoy the christmas break!!!
Lyrics from Savage Garden's Crash and Burn and are copyrighted to Savage Garden