confusion
Sunday, Mar. 23, 2003, 9:03 pm
things have gotten o so confusing. lets start from the happy beginning shall we.
friday night was kool cuz it was fun just hangin out w/ every1...but it kinda sucked in the same sense cuz lol um some ppl got really embarrassingly wasted. lol yeah so that wasnt the greatest. um de dum. we went 2 chuys 2 eat first...lil tex-mes restaurant downtown. then we headed to the engine room...but cuz the water pressure or sumthin was messed up...they couldnt flush toilets or run water or wut not...so they cancelled the show. that sucked. so we...me, jessa, sara, lauryn, and kristina said goodbye 2 emily...she had gone 2 dinner with us...and then we headed to the after party...lol not so much as after party as just a party. but yeah neway. brooke and lauryn and sara drank and got pretty dowed. lol. jessa got buzzin...and kristin and i didnt really drink. i cant. my tummy always hurts when i do. so i had 1/2 a smirnoff. nuthin grand. we left around 2 i think and headed back 2 saras house where we all crashed around 4. i woke up @ 1 and headed home then 2 buy emilys gift @ the mall.
emilys party was off the heezy 4 sheezy. lol it was fun. yay 4 choir ppl and pinatas. hola ben coma estas. lol yeah. so it was nice. i was jeremys 'date' 2 the party. that was kool. he got high the night before. that was not kool. newho. yeah so we just chilled and had fun and yada yada. around 11 jeremy and i left...took brice home...and then just drove around. it was nice. i think he was really restless...thinkin i was bored or wut not. but i really didnt mind. we went 2 walgreens 2 get my mamas bday cards...2 the new walmart 4 milk duds...and 2 blockbuster so i could buy super troopers. great movie. then we went 2 my house and watched it on my comp cuz my tvs broken. yeah it was kool. we shared a chair lol and it was nice. about 3/4 into the movie...he kissed me. lol i knew it would happen. and it was good. nice. but it helps 2 complicate things. cuz now i like them both equally...ben and jeremy...and i think its really eatin away @ ben...and its really really hard 2 know that i did that 2 him. no matter wut he says...if it hadnt been 4 me...he wouldnt be feeling that way right now. and thats not kool. ah. i dunno wut 2 do!
2day i woke up and went 2 chilis w/ my mama and my sister 4 my mamas bday. that was nice. then we headed up 2 stein mart and my sister and i bought her some cute birthday clothes. i think she really appreciated us goin w/ her and helpin her pick stuff out. so it was really kool. i came home, read, slept, went 2 sonic and then fiest park w/ jeremy. then we watched swimfan @ his house...and then i came home. now im here. absorbed in all of this confusion and watching the academy awards. i just dont no. and i feel so horrible for not knowing. o0o shit. lol. my demeanor is still not squelched though. ive been continuously for the longest time now. its fantastic. i luv u all. have a good day 2morrow. hope ur weekend rocked the cashbox.
Lyrics from Savage Garden's Crash and Burn and are copyrighted to Savage Garden